The Choice is Yours
At one point or another, every young adult experiences a time of dreadful uncertainty, or what I like to call a mid-college crisis.
Questions of doubt plague you constantly: Did I choose the right major? What if I don’t pick the right vocation? Is this what I’m supposed to be doing with my life?
As natural categorizers, we try to reduce these decisions to clear-cut choices; one must be right, and the other must be wrong. It’s easy that way, when there’s an obvious option. Especially as Catholics, obedience is easy, even preferred. The problem comes when there’s not a right or wrong answer, and we’re left having to make a choice based off our own desires. And this shakes us to the core because what if what I want is wrong – or worse – what if what I want is not what God wants.
As I sat on a campus bench the other day, asking myself those very questions, I observed this scene:
A young woman walked out of the building next to me, holding hands with a little boy. They strolled along the sidewalk, evidently enjoying the weather. She would ask him where he wanted to go, and he would point and say, “That way.” Gracefully, she would lead him in his chosen direction, careful to keep him along the sidewalk. When the child spotted memorial plaques in front of some oak trees, he screamed, “That!” She smiled, but gently corrected his speech and manners. When a fork came in the pathway, converging and then reconnecting, she asked him which direction he would like to go. He looked confused for a second, not knowing which to choose. She consoled him saying, “Don’t worry, they both lead back to the same building.” He chose a path, and they walked until they returned to the building from where they came.
The reality is, I hate making decisions. I, like most people, am terrified of being wrong. In watching that woman and little boy, however, my fears dissolved; I discovered that I was witnessing the heart of the Father. Just like the woman safely lead the child along the sidewalk, God will not lead me in a wrong direction. In fact, Proverbs 3:6 says, “In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will keep your paths straight.” At one point, the sidewalk divided and forced the boy to choose a path, but they all lead back to the same building. Likewise, God has many paths to sainthood, but they all lead to eternity in Heaven. He even teaches us how to pray, just as the woman taught the boy how to ask properly.
As long as we remain on the path to holiness, we cannot not do the Father’s will. Peter Kreeft goes so far to say, “If you truly love God and His will, then doing what you will, will, in fact, be doing what God wills.”
God is teaching me to trust Him, and to follow the desires which He has placed inside my heart. Just like a child, he leads me on.
Doubt has no room while holding the Father’s hand.